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riots are breaking out in glasgow right now, scottish flags are being burned, people are making nazi salutes, there is racism and sectarianism and god knows what else, there are supposed stabbings, people are being beaten up purely for voting Yes, but the bbc has decided that a news story more worthy of being reported is the first iphone 6 owner dropping his new phone. the anti-scottish bias from the bbc is reaching new levels of absurdity
the ONLY people I maintain this space for are myself (decolonizing my mind) and fellow orphans, adoptees, and foster kids.
And to a certain extent, POC and indigenous parents looking to protect their communities against ethnocidal “Kill the Native, Save the Child” programs both international and domestic.
If you belong to one of the aforementioned groups, feel free to get in touch. There are a surprising number of class bastards on here, which is glorious, but it can be hard to find peers because there aren’t so many who post about adoption and orphanhood, which is also cool though, you do YOU bbs. <3
If you don’t belong to one of the aforementioned groups, you’re welcome to introduce yourself, but I really don’t give a fig one way or the other if you stick around, and I definitely don’t care about educating you. Sorry not sorry.
1) They don’t understand your everyday experience with microaggressions.
The most frequent response I get from my parents when I talk about a microagression directed towards me is: Maybe they (usually a white person) is having a bad day and didn’t mean it.
This complete dismissal of my lived experience, my TRUTH, does irreversible damage to my mind, my body, and my spirit.
2) They stutter and falter when they talk about race or ethnicity.
They have a hard time naming race and ethnicity. Seriously. It’s like watching someone with a bad case of constipation. Uttering anything along the lines of Asian, Filipino, White, Black, South Asian, etc…is difficult for them. And if they manage to form a coherent thought it’s communicated with a pretentious air, like they’ve bestowed a magic gift of knowledge on me.
3) They tell me, “You’re being really mean right now” when I’m ranting about race and adoption.
Which really just means: Shut up and don’t talk about race because it makes us uncomfortable. Oh, and: Your anger is uncalled for.
This list isn’t finished. All you transracial adoptees know that. We live difficult and complex lives. If you have anything to add to the list, reblog and add.
4) Everything is somehow my fault. If we’re talking about adoption and I’m expressing how difficult it was to grow up in a White family, in a White town and my parents get upset? It’s my fault.
Microagressions? Definitely my fault.
I’m upset because of racism? My fault, I shouldn’t have been reading about it/watching that/talking to those people/idk, existing in a racist world (this is the one that really blows my mind).
5) They dismiss or ignore my life experiences and then feel hurt that I don’t want to tell them things.
Yesterday I mentioned that I had read an article about how it’s documented that Black women have a more difficult time getting hired and how it made me feel discouraged about my job hunt (in a light-hearted, chuckling, ‘isn’t that the darndest thing’ way because you have to be cute and easygoing about it, of course) and both my parents
….just ignored me. They didn’t say anything at all. In the next few days, my mom will almost definitely talk to me about how I need to stop reading about racism because “it’s so negative.”
6) Having to physically defend myself as a child against violent racists at my über white school, then coming home and being disbelieved that I’d done NOTHING to provoke the assaults.
7) The complete and utter erasure of my birth language, which yes, I knew and spoke actively when I was first adopted.
8) Having my vocal antiracism and perfectly harmless, non-Eurocentric behavior be derided and pathologized as “attachment disorder,” which in Western adoption circles is commonly referred to as “serial killer syndrome.”
If you’re pissing off white feminists, you’re probably doing feminism right.
Ain’t it the TRUTH
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