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BRAND X

Orphaned transracial international ungrateful insurgent Class Bastard.

Posts tagged adoption

Aug 11 '14

mik-coolerthanyou asked:

Just imagine though if every wealthy black family adopted a white kid. I feel like people would be upset about that. Idk. Its just weird

mik-coolerthanyou and reverseracism, you may be interested in this:

reverseracism:

People would be. Of course they would be, ‘what value can a black family teach a white kid’

- Susie

In 1904, a group of forty New York orphans were sent to live with Catholic families in Arizona. However, the Catholics turned out to be Mexicans and the local Anglos were so outraged at this race boundary transgression that they instigated a mass abduction of the children.

Through this direct action, trans-racial adoption as a white privilege was resolutely reinforced. This privilege continues in the contemporary era. One can only imagine the reactions if white European children were to be sent to African or Asian countries for international adoption.

In the pre-Civil Rights United States, a handful of states even went so far as to legislate against interracial adoption or even fostering of white children by non-whites, and in the late 1990s a widely publicized controversy erupted, when a black woman in Detroit wanted to adopt a white girl.

[…]The extremely few transracial adoptions of white children to non-white adopters that have taken place in contemporary USA not surprisingly also provoke hostile reactions and suspicions that the children might have been kidnapped and abducted, considering that historically there were laws banning and prohibiting people of colour to even foster white children[…]

Within Europe there is a long and similar tradition of stories[…] about Christian children who had been kidnapped and sacrificed for ritual murdering by Jews or Roma people. Such unfounded rumours often led to massacres, pogroms, and persecution.

Sources: 1 & 2 with commentary

Aug 10 '14

OK, time to go capslock!orphan…

DEAR BIO SPAWN,

STOP BEING DERAILING GASSLIGHTING FUCKWITS TO TRANSRACIAL ADOPTEES.

THE FACT THAT SOME OF YOU IGNORANT ASS SPAWN ARE FELLOW POC MAKES IT WORSE. THIS SHIT’S EXPECTED FROM WHITE PPL, BUT WHEN IT COMES FROM YOU IT’S NOTHING LESS THAN A BETRAYAL. (as if we weren’t excluded from poc communities enough already)

I HOPE YOUS REALIZE THAT THE SAME WHITE SAVIOR INDUSTRIAL COMPLEX THAT DICTATES ALL ADOPTEES MUST ALWAYS BE GRATEFUL FOR AN INCREASINGLY ANTI-BLACK, ABUSIVE, ABLEIST SYSTEM OF CHILD TRAFFICKING (yes truly) IS THE SAME COMPLEX THAT DECREES ALL POC PARENTS AS INFERIOR TO WHITES, ALL POOR PARENTS AS INFERIOR TO THE RICH, THAT BLACK AND INDIGENOUS COMMUNITIES DESERVE TO BE DECIMATED.

OH YOU MEAN YOU DIDN’T KNOW THAT WHITE PEOPLE CAN ADOPT AS MANY CHILDREN OF COLOR AS THEY WANT AND THEN ABANDON THEM WITH NO LEGAL CONSEQUENCES BUT POC WERE LITERALLY BANNED FROM ADOPTING WHITES (to the point where there’s still public outcry when black parents try to adopt white children)

OH AND IF YOU HAVE KIDS YOU BETTER PRAY YOU’RE NEVER CAUGHT IN POVERTY, NEVER UNJUSTLY ARRESTED, NEVER A SINGLE PARENT IN THE NON-WESTERN WORLD. BECAUSE IF YOU ARE, YOUR CHILDREN WILL AUTOMATICALLY BE BRANDED ORPHANS AND INSTRUCTED TO BE GRATEFUL WHEN THEY’RE TAKEN FROM YOU, WHILE YOU’LL BE BRANDED A WORTHLESS WHORE.

PUT DOWN THE WHITE SUPREMACY-UPHOLDING KOOL-AID, DO SOME READING, AND LEARN TO LOVE YOURSELF FOR FUCKS SAKE.

YOURS IN ETERNAL INGRATITUDE,

X

Jul 31 '14
wolfperson1:

socialworkgradstudents:

waycoolhacky:

brandx:



U.S. Mother Gives Away 5-Year-Old Adopted Child From Haiti For Throwing A Temper Tantrum




"Having an instant multicultural family was magical for about two weeks,” says Stacey Conner, a 41-year-old American mom from Spokane, Washington.
After she volunteered in an orphanage in Haiti in 2005, Conner and her husband adopted a 5-year-old Haitian boy named “J.”
Conner claims the boy had attachment disorder and began a strict regimen of attachment parenting of constant surveillance in which a child must often ask for food and water. After two months, J threw a tantrum where he unintentionally hit Conner’s nose with the back of his head.
Conner says the 5-year-old’s strike was accidental, but describes it as “a domestic violence situation.”
"Forget love. Right then, I didn’t even like J.” J was then sent to live with another family in the Midwest.
Conner’s biological children adjusted seamlessly to life without their adoptive brother. But other people were puzzled. Neighbors who had seen J riding his bike asked, “Where’s your son?” When Conner answered truthfully, “I’d get the most horrified stares, so I’d keep walking. And I didn’t tell many out-of-town friends or extended family for months.”
Despite such events, the Conners were approved by local social workers to become a foster family, and in October 2013 received a 3-month-old boy as their first placement.

Sources: [x] [x]


Sounds like something out of The Onion.

IMPORTANT SHIT TO KNOW FOR CONTEXT
Kids with RAD can be really, really, really hard. It’s easy to assume that adoptive parents who have disrupted placements are just heartless shitheels (and some of them are), but until you have dealt with a RAD kid, you don’t know how difficult it can be. You could legit have some super dedicated amazing parents who contemplate disruption because they just don’t know what the fuck to do with RAD.
Because RAD is so hard, and because parents tend to get so little post-adoption support, and because there are so few professionals that are adoption-competent, and because adoption is an ethical nightmare land where people with lots of selfish ignorant horrible reasons for wanting to adopt are still able to do so with relative ease, there is quite an active industry for “treating” RAD that bilks some well-intentioned parents and deeply attracts some abusive ones.
If you work in the field of adoption or mental health, do your research and know some red flags. If a parent or professional says they engage in “attachment therapy,” get more information and details right away. “Attachment therapy” sounds like a nice and wonderful thing, but your definition of “attachment therapy” may not be theirs. It may be the kind of attachment therapy practiced by the family above, which is not about attachment but is about punitive, restrictive, abusive measures of control designed to break a child down so they may be “reattached” to their adoptive parents. It is a systematic plan for creating Stockholm syndrome, and it is vile and dangerous, but it used to have a monopoly on adoption treatments, and you will still encounter any number of people who believe in it whole-heartedly.
Some things to know:
Attachment therapy is a collection of techniques and theories that have been given widely different names or included under different modalities over the years.
Some of those previous modalities include rage reduction therapy, regression, holding therapy, and rebirthing
Researching the history of those therapies can give you a good nose for sensing out if the “attachment therapy” you’re hearing about is just “rage reduction therapy” repackaged
Rage reduction is the belief that rage must be “released” for the child to heal. Techniques for releasing the rage include forced holding, binding, tickling, pinching, and knuckling. Children may also be laid upon by full-grown adults for hours at a time, with their face held to force eye contact. The angrier the child is, the more it’s working.
Holding therapy requires bodily contact with the child, perhaps swaddled and restrained, for long periods of time. It can be done in a non-damaging way — many traumatized children will benefit from experiencing healthy, positive touch — but the key component that’s damaging is when this is non-consensual and the child exhibits distress.
Regression and rebirth therapy encourage children to re-experience their traumatic memories and return to the age they were when they experienced them. If they experienced trauma as a baby, they will be diapered and swaddled. Rebirthing requires wrapping a child tightly, sitting on them, and forcing them to fight their way out into the arms of their adoptive parent. Rebirthing is outlawed in a handful of states because this technique has killed children.
The basic theory behind “attachment therapy” is that children are enraged at a primitive, inaccessible level of their being, and this suppressed rage inhibits them from forming attachments and results in their behaviors, which include failure to develop a conscience, seeking control instead of closeness, and manipulation.
Children who require “attachment therapy” are considered at risk of becoming psychopaths without it. Because the “symptoms” include manipulation and an inability to recognize “love”, children who complain of abuse or describe their experience with these therapies as painful and terrible have no credibility — obviously, if they were “healed,” they would understand that this was for their own good.
"Attachment therapy" appeals to parents who are at the end of their ropes and have been promised that this will fix their children, AND it appeals to incredibly rigid, strict parents who value obedience.
"Attachment therapy" is also appealing because it initially appears to work. Some children become terrified of their parents and do whatever they can to avoid the abuse. It doesn’t matter if they are also exhibiting signs and symptoms of immense depression, dissociation, or withdrawal (although sometimes those are considered further "resistance"), as long as they are compliant.
And, more importantly, for reference, here are some red flags. If you hear a family or professional or treatment facility mention the following things, dig deeper and ask more questions, because they may be practicing “attachment therapy.” These red flags aren’t confirmations — the “attachment therapy” vernacular has entered some mainstream mental health circles and been morphed, so a family may talk about “strong-sitting” when what they actually mean is yoga or time-outs. But if you hear “strong-sitting,” you should immediately be asking that family to describe what that looks like, when it happens, how often it happens, etc.
Strong-sitting: the child must sit with their legs crossed and arms entwined. They may be forced to sit like this for hours, until they are calm and pleasant.
Strong-talking: the child must place their hand over their mouth. They are not allowed to speak until they are ready to join the family again. Frequently used on children who speak another language adopted into a family who does not speak that language, to break them of their first language.
"Allowed to join the family": this can be psychological (i.e. not allowed to speak to the family) or physical (not allowed to sit with the family at dinner). The right to be a part of the family is used as a privilege and punishment.
Attachment camp: there are a variety of camps that practice attachment therapy, separating the RAD child from the biological children and not allowing them to “join” the camp or their families until they are thoroughly broken and healed. These camps look like any other kind of therapeutic, adoption, or family camp from the materials. Look for children wearing blue or red bandanas — this is how they separate the RAD children from the other children.
Assumption that children always lie: the fact is, RAD children do lie, so this is difficult. But “attachment therapy” advocates assume that until the child is “healed,” nothing they say can be believed (including if the child is telling the parent they are being fatally hurt — this is how children have died during rebirthing therapy, their cries for help were assumed to be manipulation). The belief that these children will turn into psychopaths without intervention means that they are considered psychopaths already, and nothing they say or do can be trusted. It’s a very dangerous way to treat any kind of client, but especially the vulnerable.
Forced eye contact: “attachment therapy” proponents believe that the child must be forced to maintain eye contact with their parents. If they look away, their faces must be held. If they move their eyes, the parent must lie directly on top of them and hold their faces directly in front of theirs, so they can’t look away.
Restitutions: If a child messes up, they are forced to make restitution before they are allowed to “join the family” or acquire whatever privilege has been taken away (and for “attachment therapy,” privileges include beds, the right to speak, the right to go to the bathroom, the right to food, etc.). These restitutions may not be harmful by themselves (like, sweeping the floor), but the use of restitutions to acquire basic food, safety, or affection is incredibly damaging.
CHECK YOUR CLINICIAN CREDENTIALS. Many “attachment therapy” advocates have no clinical training or education. They are “attachment experts” or “attachment advocates” or “attachment specialists.” They are not psychologists, psychiatrists, doctors, or social workers, and they are not licensed.
Nancy Thomas, Foster Cline, Evergreen CO, or Love and Logic: Nancy Thomas and Foster Cline are the two flagship names in “attachment therapy.” If a family or clinician states that they follow these practices or believe in these techniques, it is the biggest red flag you could get. Probably the easiest way to initially check a treatment facility or camp to see if they are “attachment therapy” or actual therapy is to see if they’re listed on Nancy Thomas’ website. She has made quite a lucrative career over selling her model, and runs many camps. Foster Cline was initially based in Evergreen, CO, and many facilities there still use his Love and Logic model. He is no longer based in CO, because his licensure was stripped after one of his students killed a child during rebirthing therapy.
KNOW ABOUT ATTACHMENT THERAPY, social workers and clinicians, because if you ever work with an adoptive family, you WILL run into it, and you will need to know what you’re looking at, especially if you’re up against clinicians who still buy into it.

Quoting from brandx here on RAD, because I’m pretty sure this kid is too old for that:

Reactive Attachment Disorder (AKA Attachment Disorder) IS actually a legitimate condition.
But it’s ONLY applicable to children about 3 and under, entails completely responses, and is arguably not even a disorder (but Westerners gotta pathologize everything that isn’t 100% nuclear fam heteronormative, so). It means that if a child goes through a lot of displacement (orphanages, foster care etc.), they get confused as to who their primary caregivers are, so sometimes they attach to complete strangers.


The above comes from this response to an ask. But I highly recommend everyone checks out their blog.

Thanks wolfperson1. You should know that all of the information on Reactive Attachment Disorder that “socialworkgradstudents” just steamrolled onto my post is grossly inaccurate, and their information on attachment therapy pitifully outdated.
Such misinformation is bad enough in and of itself.
But the fact that this provincial bio spawn felt compelled to talk over an ACTUAL transracial international “RAD” adoptee, completely ignore my conveniently hyperlinked sources on the disorder, AND spread their pseudoscientific bullshit over the plight of a tiny Haitian child abandoned and then trafficked by white Americans —
It just goes to show why the U.S. adoption/foster system is as incompetent & abusive as it is with more child deaths than anywhere else in the industrialized world (even with Sweden trafficking far more adoptees re: own population). 
I’m still on hiatus and don’t have time to truly counteract socialworkgradstudents’ bullshit here. I just had to point this out for the many adoptees and our actual allies who follow this space. Lord deliver us class bastards from American social workers, JFC.

wolfperson1:

socialworkgradstudents:

waycoolhacky:

brandx:

U.S. Mother Gives Away 5-Year-Old Adopted Child From Haiti For Throwing A Temper Tantrum

"Having an instant multicultural family was magical for about two weeks,” says Stacey Conner, a 41-year-old American mom from Spokane, Washington.

After she volunteered in an orphanage in Haiti in 2005, Conner and her husband adopted a 5-year-old Haitian boy named “J.”

Conner claims the boy had attachment disorder and began a strict regimen of attachment parenting of constant surveillance in which a child must often ask for food and water. After two months, J threw a tantrum where he unintentionally hit Conner’s nose with the back of his head.

Conner says the 5-year-old’s strike was accidental, but describes it as “a domestic violence situation.”

"Forget love. Right then, I didn’t even like J.” J was then sent to live with another family in the Midwest.

Conner’s biological children adjusted seamlessly to life without their adoptive brother. But other people were puzzled. Neighbors who had seen J riding his bike asked, “Where’s your son?” When Conner answered truthfully, “I’d get the most horrified stares, so I’d keep walking. And I didn’t tell many out-of-town friends or extended family for months.”

Despite such events, the Conners were approved by local social workers to become a foster family, and in October 2013 received a 3-month-old boy as their first placement.

Sources: [x] [x]

Sounds like something out of The Onion.

IMPORTANT SHIT TO KNOW FOR CONTEXT

Kids with RAD can be really, really, really hard. It’s easy to assume that adoptive parents who have disrupted placements are just heartless shitheels (and some of them are), but until you have dealt with a RAD kid, you don’t know how difficult it can be. You could legit have some super dedicated amazing parents who contemplate disruption because they just don’t know what the fuck to do with RAD.

Because RAD is so hard, and because parents tend to get so little post-adoption support, and because there are so few professionals that are adoption-competent, and because adoption is an ethical nightmare land where people with lots of selfish ignorant horrible reasons for wanting to adopt are still able to do so with relative ease, there is quite an active industry for “treating” RAD that bilks some well-intentioned parents and deeply attracts some abusive ones.

If you work in the field of adoption or mental health, do your research and know some red flags. If a parent or professional says they engage in “attachment therapy,” get more information and details right away. “Attachment therapy” sounds like a nice and wonderful thing, but your definition of “attachment therapy” may not be theirs. It may be the kind of attachment therapy practiced by the family above, which is not about attachment but is about punitive, restrictive, abusive measures of control designed to break a child down so they may be “reattached” to their adoptive parents. It is a systematic plan for creating Stockholm syndrome, and it is vile and dangerous, but it used to have a monopoly on adoption treatments, and you will still encounter any number of people who believe in it whole-heartedly.

Some things to know:

  • Attachment therapy is a collection of techniques and theories that have been given widely different names or included under different modalities over the years.
  • Some of those previous modalities include rage reduction therapy, regression, holding therapy, and rebirthing
  • Researching the history of those therapies can give you a good nose for sensing out if the “attachment therapy” you’re hearing about is just “rage reduction therapy” repackaged
  • Rage reduction is the belief that rage must be “released” for the child to heal. Techniques for releasing the rage include forced holding, binding, tickling, pinching, and knuckling. Children may also be laid upon by full-grown adults for hours at a time, with their face held to force eye contact. The angrier the child is, the more it’s working.
  • Holding therapy requires bodily contact with the child, perhaps swaddled and restrained, for long periods of time. It can be done in a non-damaging way — many traumatized children will benefit from experiencing healthy, positive touch — but the key component that’s damaging is when this is non-consensual and the child exhibits distress.
  • Regression and rebirth therapy encourage children to re-experience their traumatic memories and return to the age they were when they experienced them. If they experienced trauma as a baby, they will be diapered and swaddled. Rebirthing requires wrapping a child tightly, sitting on them, and forcing them to fight their way out into the arms of their adoptive parent. Rebirthing is outlawed in a handful of states because this technique has killed children.
  • The basic theory behind “attachment therapy” is that children are enraged at a primitive, inaccessible level of their being, and this suppressed rage inhibits them from forming attachments and results in their behaviors, which include failure to develop a conscience, seeking control instead of closeness, and manipulation.
  • Children who require “attachment therapy” are considered at risk of becoming psychopaths without it. Because the “symptoms” include manipulation and an inability to recognize “love”, children who complain of abuse or describe their experience with these therapies as painful and terrible have no credibility — obviously, if they were “healed,” they would understand that this was for their own good.
  • "Attachment therapy" appeals to parents who are at the end of their ropes and have been promised that this will fix their children, AND it appeals to incredibly rigid, strict parents who value obedience.
  • "Attachment therapy" is also appealing because it initially appears to work. Some children become terrified of their parents and do whatever they can to avoid the abuse. It doesn’t matter if they are also exhibiting signs and symptoms of immense depression, dissociation, or withdrawal (although sometimes those are considered further "resistance"), as long as they are compliant.

And, more importantly, for reference, here are some red flags. If you hear a family or professional or treatment facility mention the following things, dig deeper and ask more questions, because they may be practicing “attachment therapy.” These red flags aren’t confirmations — the “attachment therapy” vernacular has entered some mainstream mental health circles and been morphed, so a family may talk about “strong-sitting” when what they actually mean is yoga or time-outs. But if you hear “strong-sitting,” you should immediately be asking that family to describe what that looks like, when it happens, how often it happens, etc.

  • Strong-sitting: the child must sit with their legs crossed and arms entwined. They may be forced to sit like this for hours, until they are calm and pleasant.
  • Strong-talking: the child must place their hand over their mouth. They are not allowed to speak until they are ready to join the family again. Frequently used on children who speak another language adopted into a family who does not speak that language, to break them of their first language.
  • "Allowed to join the family": this can be psychological (i.e. not allowed to speak to the family) or physical (not allowed to sit with the family at dinner). The right to be a part of the family is used as a privilege and punishment.
  • Attachment camp: there are a variety of camps that practice attachment therapy, separating the RAD child from the biological children and not allowing them to “join” the camp or their families until they are thoroughly broken and healed. These camps look like any other kind of therapeutic, adoption, or family camp from the materials. Look for children wearing blue or red bandanas — this is how they separate the RAD children from the other children.
  • Assumption that children always lie: the fact is, RAD children do lie, so this is difficult. But “attachment therapy” advocates assume that until the child is “healed,” nothing they say can be believed (including if the child is telling the parent they are being fatally hurt — this is how children have died during rebirthing therapy, their cries for help were assumed to be manipulation). The belief that these children will turn into psychopaths without intervention means that they are considered psychopaths already, and nothing they say or do can be trusted. It’s a very dangerous way to treat any kind of client, but especially the vulnerable.
  • Forced eye contact: “attachment therapy” proponents believe that the child must be forced to maintain eye contact with their parents. If they look away, their faces must be held. If they move their eyes, the parent must lie directly on top of them and hold their faces directly in front of theirs, so they can’t look away.
  • Restitutions: If a child messes up, they are forced to make restitution before they are allowed to “join the family” or acquire whatever privilege has been taken away (and for “attachment therapy,” privileges include beds, the right to speak, the right to go to the bathroom, the right to food, etc.). These restitutions may not be harmful by themselves (like, sweeping the floor), but the use of restitutions to acquire basic food, safety, or affection is incredibly damaging.
  • CHECK YOUR CLINICIAN CREDENTIALS. Many “attachment therapy” advocates have no clinical training or education. They are “attachment experts” or “attachment advocates” or “attachment specialists.” They are not psychologists, psychiatrists, doctors, or social workers, and they are not licensed.
  • Nancy Thomas, Foster Cline, Evergreen CO, or Love and Logic: Nancy Thomas and Foster Cline are the two flagship names in “attachment therapy.” If a family or clinician states that they follow these practices or believe in these techniques, it is the biggest red flag you could get. Probably the easiest way to initially check a treatment facility or camp to see if they are “attachment therapy” or actual therapy is to see if they’re listed on Nancy Thomas’ website. She has made quite a lucrative career over selling her model, and runs many camps. Foster Cline was initially based in Evergreen, CO, and many facilities there still use his Love and Logic model. He is no longer based in CO, because his licensure was stripped after one of his students killed a child during rebirthing therapy.

KNOW ABOUT ATTACHMENT THERAPY, social workers and clinicians, because if you ever work with an adoptive family, you WILL run into it, and you will need to know what you’re looking at, especially if you’re up against clinicians who still buy into it.

Quoting from brandx here on RAD, because I’m pretty sure this kid is too old for that:

Reactive Attachment Disorder (AKA Attachment Disorder) IS actually a legitimate condition.
But it’s ONLY applicable to children about 3 and under, entails completely responses, and is arguably not even a disorder (but Westerners gotta pathologize everything that isn’t 100% nuclear fam heteronormative, so). It means that if a child goes through a lot of displacement (orphanages, foster care etc.), they get confused as to who their primary caregivers are, so sometimes they attach to complete strangers.
The above comes from this response to an ask. But I highly recommend everyone checks out their blog.

Thanks wolfperson1. You should know that all of the information on Reactive Attachment Disorder that “socialworkgradstudents” just steamrolled onto my post is grossly inaccurate, and their information on attachment therapy pitifully outdated.

Such misinformation is bad enough in and of itself.

But the fact that this provincial bio spawn felt compelled to talk over an ACTUAL transracial international “RAD” adoptee, completely ignore my conveniently hyperlinked sources on the disorder, AND spread their pseudoscientific bullshit over the plight of a tiny Haitian child abandoned and then trafficked by white Americans

It just goes to show why the U.S. adoption/foster system is as incompetent & abusive as it is with more child deaths than anywhere else in the industrialized world (even with Sweden trafficking far more adoptees re: own population).

I’m still on hiatus and don’t have time to truly counteract socialworkgradstudents’ bullshit here. I just had to point this out for the many adoptees and our actual allies who follow this space. Lord deliver us class bastards from American social workers, JFC.

Jul 13 '14

lavenderpenny asked:

hey again! i hope you're well :-) so yes i've been reading through your reactive attachment disorder tag, i see RAD be attributed to a lot of murdered orphans by their adopted parents and from what i can see it seems to be a readily used excuse for abusive parents defending their actions? It's kind of confusing to me about whether it's a legitimate issue that gets misused by adoptive parents or a fabricated condition used against children who don't do exactly what their adoptive parents (...)
(…) expect them to. i’d like to know more about it if you have any resources or wouldn’t mind explaining it yourself? i hope my question makes sense!
Reactive Attachment Disorder (AKA Attachment Disorder) IS actually a legitimate condition.
But it’s ONLY applicable to children about 3 and under, entails completely responses, and is arguably not even a disorder (but Westerners gotta pathologize everything that isn’t 100% nuclear fam heteronormative, so). It means that if a child goes through a lot of displacement (orphanages, foster care etc.), they get confused as to who their primary caregivers are, so sometimes they attach to complete strangers.
But the pseudoscientific “attachment disorder” that adoptees & foster kids get branded with is commonly referred to as “serial killer syndrome.” Western adoption “experts” compare us to Adolf Hitler and Ted Bundy, which (given that the majority of adoptees worldwide are not white, Aryan, or male) can get grating, yes? Then there’s the fact that the “treatments” for RAD/AD are actual child abuse & torture.
I’ve gotten a bunch of new followers over recent flurry from some of my posts that got hijacked by Well-Intentioned Western(tm) spawn on RAD. And to them, I must say:
If you really are so irredeemably shitbrained to believe in that latter definition of attachment disorder, unfollow me right the fuck now. Seriously, that level of gullibility poses a danger. X
Jul 13 '14
Jul 13 '14

#196.

confessions-of-an-adoptee:

I was trans-racially adopted with my twin brother. We’re 24 and we have never spoken about it. I want more than anything to reclaim my heritage, and am in the process of learning Spanish (albeit slowly), and am beginning to learn my history. I want to talk to my brother about this, because he’s the only person who understand the situation blow-for-blow. But I’m so afraid that he isn’t affected like I am. I’m afraid he’ll think I’m blowing it out of proportion. I’m scared and I can’t decide if I’m willing to breach that confrontation and risk finding out that my blood doesn’t empathize and that I am, truly, alone. And if he isn’t in the same boat I am, then I don’t know if I can ever seek out my birthmother. If I were to meet her, how could I ever say “Your son doesn’t want to meet you. I am here by myself.”

Jul 11 '14
"While the purported purpose of the bill is to reduce the number of children in orphanages, the opposite will most certainly result. According to Kathryn Joyce in The Child Catchers intercountry adoptions actually increase the number of children living in institutions: “Children who were not unparented or homeless before end up becoming institutionalized as a direct result of orphanages setting up shop in poor areas.”

The adoption industry helps create these institutions, often funded in large part, by grateful adoptive parents. As we’ve seen in the Ethiopian case, practitioners may falsely claim children are orphans in order to line their pockets with American money.

Furthermore, increasing intercountry adoptions runs the risk that children will be placed in unsafe homes where they may be killed, abused, or dumped into another unsafe home, as the recent series of stories on “re-homing” has shown us. It also diverts money which could be used to help children remain within their families."

[Birth Mother] First Mother Forum: Encouraging intercountry adoptions with hard cash

this article starts with the line ‘when half the faculty at Harvard and Boston College Law Schools endorse a bill that encourages poor countries to take children from their mothers and send them to the United States for adoption, you’d think something was amiss’ and it’s probably a sign i read too many (or just enough) adoption blogs that my first thought was ‘i thought that was the whole point of international adoption’.

(via keelanrosa)

"Children who were not unparented or homeless before end up becoming institutionalized as a direct result of orphanages setting up shop in poor areas.”

Jul 11 '14
  • Mom: *says something racist*
  • Me: Mom that's racist.
  • Mom: How could I possibly be racist?! I have a Korean son and an African-American daughter!!!!
  • Me: *internalize the pain, internalize the exasperation, internalize the rage, internalize everything* Okay mom.
Jul 11 '14

dickensianwerewolf:

I think that’s what scariest about pro-lifers who insist that adoption is the solution to abortion. It’s eugenic, it’s racist, it’s about having total control over people you consider inferior. You decide if they have a child, you take the child away, you raise them in your own culture, you punish them very severely if they show allegiance to their heritage or are less than your ideal. It is terrifying rhetoric said with a smile, and it implies that all adoptees were potential abortions when many parents fight very hard to keep their children.

"Adoptees who are consciously dissociating themselves from their country of origin and see themselves as whites are interpreted as examples of successful adjustments, while interest in cultural heritage and biological roots is seen as an indication of poor mental health."
Tobias Hübinette

Jul 9 '14

shecalleditsavagery asked:

Hey, could you tell me more about your NGO work?

Refugee family preservation. While not the official focus (no major NGO on earth places such direct importance on birth parents), the people I work with are at least smart enough to know that if a kid’s stuck in a strange land where they don’t speak the language and clearly don’t fit in, all after having their home obliterated by neo-imperialists (oh sorry, ‘nation builders’), the LAST thing they need is to to be taken away from whatever family they have left.

I also still consult for different child advocacy groups on international abuse epidemics that specifically target adoptees & foster children.